Owning her space: Why these women aren't waiting for marriage to buy a home
For the modern woman, the traditional "I do" is being replaced by a much more powerful commitment: "I can."
Traditionally, homeownership was the ultimate wedding milestone. Today, it’s a solo power move. Rather than waiting for a partner to build a life with, women are building their own equity and security on their own terms.
In a 2020 Lamudi report, young millennial women were the top property seekers, showing a growing trend of solo homeownership.
Suzane Mabulac didn't wait for a milestone to make her move. At 30, the portfolio manager and content creator has already owned her condo for five years. She took the plunge, following in the footsteps of an aunt who did the same.
“I was ready for it,” she told PhilSTAR L!fe, noting that homeownership is a personal decision, not necessarily tied to marriage.
“I don’t think someone should wait for a partner before you buy anything for yourself kasi being financially free naman, it’s a personal thing. It’s mostly you making sure na financially prepared ka for that purchase, and it’s not dependent on anyone else. Kasi yung journey natin, it’s just all us eh,” she added.
Pauline Tañedo, a 30-year-old senior accountant, had lived alone for years by renting before taking the leap and purchasing her own home. For her, buying a property was an investment.
“Regardless kung I'm gonna get married, or I have a partner, since investment naman siya, edi go na,” she said.
How homeownership shaped them
Tañedo, who also shares solo-living content on TikTok, shared how homeownership further amplified her independence.
“Sobrang life-changing,” she said. “Dito, kailangan ko talagang gumawa ng paraan sa lahat. Alamin lahat on my own…Parang feeling ko, before, independent na ako. Tapos nung naging homeowner ako, it's a different level of independence pala, especially na malayo ako sa family ko [at] sa boyfriend ko,” she added.
Mabulac echoed this. Adding that solo homeownership has helped her become more responsible and intentional in how she spends her time and money.
“Your decisions like going out with friends, going home late, staying out na mag-gimmick or working outside, yung mga stuff like that...I realized na I should be prioritizing the people that I would go to, the things that I attend to," she said, adding that living alone has helped her realize she’s much stronger than she thought and capable of handling many things on her own—like rushing herself to the hospital.
Tañedo added that homeownership is not just a financial investment, but, more importantly, an investment in herself in terms of life lessons and learnings.
“Magugulat ka, ang dami mo pa lang kayang gawin,” she said.
‘Freedom and stability’
Beyond the financial investment, buying a home is often a deeply personal declaration of self-reliance. “Having something tangible is different for everybody else. And as for me, having something tangible, it shows na I worked hard for this," Mabulac said.
“As a woman, you could do that without waiting for anyone. Kasi you're stronger than you think, and you could always take control of your finances. Not anyone else. Kasi, it's personal finance for a reason. It should be personal for you. What's working for you may not work for everybody else. Hindi mo ‘yun kailangang i-base sa ibang tao,” she added.
She added that solo living has given her confidence that she can take care of herself, wherever she is.
“It's empowering enough na when you can take care of yourself, then you can go anywhere that you want to. Ang laki-laki ng mundo, you could explore a lot of stuff…Kahit saan mo dalhin yung sarili mo, you could take care of yourself,” Mabulac said.
@pauthyyyy feat. my human drone skills lol #hometour #houseoftiktok ♬ Forever Your Girl - Paula Abdul
For her part, Tañedo said that while living alone has its pros and cons, she wouldn’t have it any other way.
“Kung babalik ako, ganun at ganun pa rin yung gagawin ko kasi, ang saya maging independent din. Siyempre may mga pros and cons naman yan, pero ang galing na you don't get to depend on someone para lang magawa yung mga bagay na gusto mo,” she said.
Breaking traditions
Maiko, a licensed real estate broker and the content creator behind She’s That Broker, told L!fe that women today are mostly career-oriented, marking a major shift from the traditional role of a wife. Janice Morales, an assistant professor of Sociology at UP Diliman, said this shift is driven by decades of advocacy for gender equality, which has enhanced women’s economic status.
"The changing views in society on gender roles and division of labor lead to opportunities for women to pursue careers outside their reproductive work. Social conditions, such as economic crisis, led to a two-wage-earner household, thus opening avenues for women to be part of the formal economy," Morales explained.
She added that better education and work opportunities have made women more financially independent, which often results in delayed marriages and shared family responsibilities.
“Homeownership at the same time becomes a source of their economic empowerment because their survival is no longer in the hands of their partner/spouse,” Morales said.
However, she noted that traditional views of women as dependent on men may be a barrier, such as in loan applications for single women.
Meanwhile, Maiko observed that women today are making informed and strategic decisions when buying property. She also noticed how today’s generation embraces their own space with designs that uniquely reflect their personalities.
“I mean, that's the ultimate Filipino dream. Our dream is to really have our own place. And iba kasi yung meron kang tinitirhan na bahay ng parents mo versus tinitirahan mo na I bought this myself,” she said.
“That gives you that sense of pride, and I think that's what women want now, na 'Hindi ako nakikitira, hindi 'to binili ng partner ko, hindi 'to bahay ng boyfriend ko, this is mine. Nobody can take that away from me.' And women now are becoming really more and more strong in the sense that I want to be proud of myself,” she added.
‘Invest in yourself'
Living alone, especially acquiring one's own property, can be intimidating, as it can be both mentally and financially challenging. But Maiko underscored that it’s important to invest in yourself.
“Nasa era na tayo ng we want to be feminine, but at the same time, we want to really be independent now. And I think that's something that I would advise everyone: Really invest in yourself. Invest in your own assets. Don't rely on other people because that's something that nobody can take away from you. And as you know, not all relationships are forever. So by having assets, nakatali na yun sa'yo forever,” she added.
She furthered that while the homebuying process can be confusing, don’t let it stop you from investing in real estate as it’s “one of the most stable investments that you can have,” just make sure that you’re well-informed.
Mabulac underscored that anyone can start where they are, no matter how small, stay consistent, and make sure to build wealth with purpose.
“No need for a ring, for a partner, for a wedding, before you start anything, and even buying property. You have to stay consistent, kasi consistency builds habit, habit builds momentum, and you have to build wealth with purpose all the time,” she explained.
