Frankie Pangilinan has been charming the Internet with her relatable no-holds-barred tweets for quite some time now.
But despite her growing social media following, the daughter of Megastar Sharon Cuneta and Sen. Francis Pangilinan admits she still finds herself at times hedged in by self-doubt.
“I super relate to being your own biggest critic, no?” Frankie said. “I haven’t successfully dealt with this yet. I’m not gonna be like, ‘I’ve fixed this and this is the way’ because I haven’t fixed it yet.”
To prevent overthinking, the 20-year-old singer-songwriter would always remind herself that everyone is a constant work in progress who is “busy” with his/her own battles. It’s a tip, she said, that she got from her cousin and travel vlogger Hannah Pangilinan.
She continued, “For example, if you’re out in public or if you’re doing something in a public setting, in a group setting, ‘di ba normally you’re kind of like scared [of] ‘what will people think of me’ and that’s when you get sort of overly critical.”
“Hannah and I realized—I think a few years back—when you’re doing that, you have to recognize that people are also doing the same thing. They’re not thinking of you. They’re too busy thinking of themselves, ‘di ba?” Frankie recounted.
“And I think that’s the thing. We’re all a little too busy with the self-critique, ‘di ba? And so, once we realize that everybody’s sort of going through that same thing, that puts it into perspective… You’re able to approach things with a little more confidence knowing that truly, people are going through the same thing as you,” she said.
Frankie said this in Bianca Gonzales’ YouTube vlog on Dec. 21, where the TV host asked Frankie, Hannah, and YouTube star Janina Vela advice for “women who tend to be hard on themselves.”
Frankie, for her part, recommends that as you focus on your own journey, you also examine yourself frequently and shun the fear of starting any task.
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When you critique yourself, do it for a purpose
Many of us have the tendency to criticize ourselves, especially when we don’t get things done perfectly. And Frankie totally gets it. That’s why, instead of letting self-criticism destroy her confidence, the internet celebrity uses it as a stepping stone to becoming better.
She elaborated, “As long as it’s not getting in the way of your productivity, I think that’s actually an insanely helpful tool. Because the skill to be able to look at yourself and look at your work and to be able to analyze it and see what you think is wrong, what you think should be done better, that’s a good thing, right?”
“That’s a good thing when it comes to bettering ourselves and producing better content in any field, just doing better work,” she added.
In addition to that, taking time to examine yourself would keep you grounded and, in turn, get you farther in life.
“I think that’s a good thing to have because there’s a lot of people naman there who may lack the self-reflection and just proceed as if everything they’re doing is perfect,” she said. “You don’t want that because there’s always gonna be room for growth and there’s always gonna be space for that self-improvement,” she said.
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Begin and keep going
As a writer, Frankie would sometimes find herself stuck with writer’s block. For that, she just tells herself, “You can’t get better at something if you don’t do it.”
“Just keep going. Like for me, just keep writing. If it sucks, then I can fix it later… Kasi you can always sort of injecting quality as you go on. But just get it done. Just start it. Just open that document, start that Zoom meeting ‘cause it’s not gonna get better if you don’t touch it,” Frankie said.
She added that if there’s anything self-doubt should do, it is to let you see how you can improve yourself.
“And I think that pride yourself nalang in the fact that you’re able to keenly see where you can do better, but at the same time, don’t allow that naman to stop you from doing it at all. There has to be a healthy balance,” she concluded.