Late-night TV hosts are on the edge of their seats waiting for election results
Late-night TV hosts in the US have had four years of free material courtesy of ridiculous tweets and pressers by President Donald Trump.
When Trump tweeted, “I inherited a mess!” Stephen Colbert answered, “No, you inherited a fortune. We elected a mess.” Trump called Colbert a “no-talent guy”; Colbert called him a “cartoon president” and a “douchebag.”
Now, the hosts are on the edge of their talk-show seats and having emotonal moments as they await election results.
Jimmy Kimmel called the waiting a “pollercoaster of emotions and nausea.”
Seth Meyers said, “Counting votes is not finding votes. They’re not scanning the beach with a metal detector.”
Jimmy Fallon said, “Seriously, today felt like waking up with a hangover and realizing you’re still at the bar.”
From Trump’s first unhinged solo press conference in the spring of 2017 to the “covfefe” kerfuffle, and his drinking bleach advice to kill the coronavirus, it’s been a goldmine not even the best SNL writers and stand-ups could have come up with.
Trump’s tweets are not just the stuff of opening monologues or what the emoji facepalm was made for. They have also caused stock prices to tumble—even before his inauguration in January 2017.
Who would have thought a US president would pay porn stars to keep quiet? Or that mafia tactics would be employed during his impeachment inquiry. Or that Trump, who endlessly says, “I’m the least racist person I know,” would accuse an Indiana-born federal judge for not being able to be impartial because he’s “Mexican,” which by the way is textbook racism.
It’s not just late-night TV hosts. Even news anchors have expressed frustration over Trump. CNN’s Don Lemon at one point during the Stormy Daniels scandal in 2018 shook his head and said something like, “I can’t believe I’m using the words ‘President of the United States’ and ‘porn stars’ in one sentence.”
The only gesture missing was slapping his palm to his forehead and he would have illustrated how the world felt watching what was happening in and to America.
The list goes on and on. As late-night talk show hosts have said repeatedly, you really “can’t make this shit up.”
Trump’s tweets, however, are not just the stuff of opening monologues or what the emoji facepalm was made for. They have also caused stock prices to tumble.
In a Washington Post interview, Corey Lewandowski, Trump’s former campaign manager, said, “In 140 characters, he can change the direction of a Fortune 100 company, he can notify world leaders and he can also notify government agencies that business as usual is over.”
In January 2017, Trump tweeted that “General Motors is sending Mexican made model of Chevy Cruze to U.S. car dealers-tax free across border. Make in U.S.A. or pay big border tax!”
GM’s stock value declined by 24 cents to $34.60 a share as Google searches about the carmaker spiked by 200 percent.
An hour later, GM issued a statement, “All Chevrolet Cruze sedans sold in the U.S. are built in GM’s assembly plant in Lordstown, Ohio,” and that the units assembled in Mexico were for global markets.
The crazy thing is, Trump wasn’t even the president yet. This was on Jan. 3, 2017—17 days away from his Jan. 20 inauguration.
Jimmy Fallon: ‘Seriously, today felt like waking up with a hangover and realizing you’re still at the bar.’
Four years later and many tweets that sent the US stock market dropping many times over, the 2020 presidential election has come and passed. And now, the counting.
The Daily Show’s “Votegasm 2020: What Could Go Wrong (Again)?” host Trevor Noah said that when Trump nabbed Florida it made sense “because Trump is the ultimate Florida mascot, you know? He’s got the tan, all his friends are in jail, somehow he has money and he has a much younger wife.”
Three days after the election, it’s understandable that talk-show hosts are jumpy and emotional.
They have, in the past four years, vacillated between making fun and expressing frustration over the America whose freedom of speech has led them to their very stage.
Trevor Noah, ‘The Daily Show,’ Comedy Central
Everyone else looking at Pennsylvania like... pic.twitter.com/7cK5aEIdo0
— Trevor Noah (@Trevornoah) November 4, 2020
Jimmy Kimmel, ‘Jimmy Kimmel Live,’ ABC
Dear @realDonaldTrump - you accidentally deleted this tweet about Poles pic.twitter.com/D5rQd5KMXN
— Jimmy Kimmel (@jimmykimmel) November 4, 2020
Jimmy Fallon, ‘The Tonight Show,’ NBC
“Dude, they’re not 'finding' votes… they’re counting them!”
— The Tonight Show (@FallonTonight) November 5, 2020
Jimmy reacts to Trump’s tweet stating some states are “finding” new votes #ElectionResults2020#FallonMono #FallonTonight pic.twitter.com/qVTrYQT1CU
Stephen Colbert, ‘Late Night with Stephen Colbert,’ CBS
Anybody know what to do when your Democracy does this? pic.twitter.com/wnnNXNm8du
— Stephen Colbert (@StephenAtHome) November 5, 2020
Seth Meyers, ‘Late Night with Seth Meyers,’ NBC
“I don’t know what’s going to happen in Georgia, but, as we’re taping this, there are more votes to count in Democratic areas and that godforsaken New York Times needle has it tilting toward Biden.” – @SethMeyers #ACloserLook pic.twitter.com/laYpJyRxWs
— Late Night with Seth Meyers (@LateNightSeth) November 5, 2020
James Corden, ‘The Late Late Show with James Corden,’ CBS
Breathe.
— James Corden (@JKCorden) November 4, 2020
Breathe.
In through the nose.
Out through the mouth.
Keep. It. Together. X
Conan O’Brien, ‘Conan,’ TBS
Dear White House Movers:
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) November 6, 2020
Ask for the money up front. pic.twitter.com/TERrL1yDvL