Josh Kim & Mary Buenaventura
A real Korean-Filipino love story, worthy of a K-drama
"I love you, Jagi.” This is what a Korean tells his Filipino sweetheart (jagi) every night before they sleep. And she says, “I love you, Appa (daddy)” in return. This is not a K-drama, but a real love story I am about to tell you.
The oppa (read: crush) is the good-looking Josh Kim, whose Korean name is Moo Hyung Kim. But he is better known by friends and admirers as a lookalike of Gong Yoo, because he—with his flawless skin and tall, handsome persona—looks like a younger version of the Korean superstar. Josh was a stage actor in Korea who now takes the role of husband and father more seriously.
“But I am older than Gong Yoo,” says the humble Josh who played a cameo role in the Viu movie Secret Ingredient starring Julia Barretto.
The Philippine beauty (rather, read: beauty and brains) is his wife Mary Buenaventura, well known in the media industry as the dynamic president/CEO of Omnicom Media Group Philippines. “I love my profession. I am passionate about leading the business with a client-first and people-first approach. I also advocate for diversity and champion women at work. However, my husband and my son are the ‘whys’ in my life that drive me to be passionate in what I do.”
The love story of Josh and Mary began seven years ago when they met in Seoul.
Mary recalls: “We met at a coffee shop on a spring afternoon during a trip to Seoul with a friend. He was wearing a suit and a long coat with his beautiful shining skin. It was his smile that sealed it. He has the most beautiful smile. He is kind, funny, simple and humble and a good son to his parents—qualities that I am drawn to.”
Josh, on the other hand, says: “Mary has a really nice personality. She is very supportive and loving towards family. She may look strong but she is kind-hearted.”
Josh finished his Theater Arts degree at Yongin University in Korea, while Mary took up Economics at Boston University. Together they make a very compatible pair worthy of a real-life K-drama.
After six months of dating, Josh proposed to Mary.
Wow, so fast and efficient, I told Josh jokingly. But seriously, he replied that he and Mary met in their early 40s and he wanted them to have a child right away.
They had two weddings: one in Manila, and another in Seoul.
Mary notes: “Philippine weddings are more complicated and dressy, with an entourage, from flower girls to sponsors. There is usually a program, merrymaking and dancing.”
Josh adds: “Korean weddings are simpler and more practical. The bride and groom usually wear rented wedding outfits, and the guests go home after dinner, in consideration of the next day’s work. Guests give, not boxed gifts, but envelopes of money that, when totaled, are enough to cover the couple’s wedding expenses and honeymoon. “
Mary says: “I remember that, before the wedding, I sat in a room where guests greeted me and posed for photo ops.”
They honeymooned in New York but have yet to travel together to Europe, on a belated honeymoon they hope to take with their adorable son Cristiano, nicknamed Kimchi.
Now five years old, Kimchi is in Year 1 at the Nord Anglia International School Manila. “He loves math, traveling, and the water,” says Mary who originally wanted to enroll him in ISM where she studied, but the couple opted for a school conveniently located nearer their home.
Did cultural differences ever matter in their relationship? What adjustments did each have to make?
“If I had met Josh in early 2000, maybe it would have mattered. Korea used to be a conservative society. We are both open individuals, and the only adjustment we had to deal with was the way we raise our son. Filipinos and Koreans raise children quite differently, but we both strive to find a perfect balance. Josh likes living in the Philippines but I see him struggle with the common inefficiencies in daily services because Korea is a first world country.”
Josh is amazed how Filipinos value family, and how women are career-driven. Mary admires the Koreans’ love for country.
Prior to meeting Mary, Josh’s first time to visit the Philippines was in Cebu with his friends. He did encounter some traffic problems on the road then, but today, he is a skillful driver who enjoys bringing Kimchi to school and fetching him in the afternoon since he has a more flexible schedule. He is a part-time online automotive consultant in Korea (it was his fulltime job before they got married). He is starting a trading company that will bring hospital-grade pet products at reasonable prices from Korea to the Philippines.
Do Josh and Mary watch Korean dramas?
“I love K-dramas,” Mary replies. “Been watching since 2000. I love The Goblin (which stars Gong Yoo). We used the OST (original soundtrack) of Beautiful Life for our wedding.”
Mary explains that Josh doesn’t really watch K-dramas as much as she does.
Marunong ka na ba mag-Tagalog? I ask Josh. “Konti lang” is his quick reply.
Mary doesn’t speak Korean “but I can understand a little. The Korean values which I like are ‘family first,’ the importance of education and their love for country, which is admirable.”
Josh says: “I am amazed at how Filipinos value family more than the Koreans do. And how women in the Philippines are career-driven.”
Some trivia questions for Josh: Why do Koreans always order iced Americano coffee in K-dramas? (“Koreans really love iced Americano not only because it tastes good but also because it has no sugar.”)
Do most Koreans sleep on heated floors like in K-dramas? (“Yes, most bedrooms have heated floors, these are most practical.”)
Do parents, especially from chaebol families, still believe in fixed marriages? (“Maybe in the past, but not anymore.”)
Do Koreans really kneel down to ask forgiveness from a person? (“Yes, it conveys sincerity. In fact, I knelt once before my boss when an officemate committed an error but I apologized because I was the team leader and said I would assume responsibility for it.”)
Now we understand why Mary says that Josh is her oppa.
