[OPINION] Ride-hailing app sexual misconduct case highlights the perils of public shaming

This is already par for the course on social media. It has to be unnormalized, though. Everyone needs to learn to practice caution and restraint. “Think before you click” is an overused refrain that doesn’t cut it anymore, especially in cases where people’s reputations and actual livelihood are on the line. 

The girl’s school has issued a sobering statement: “We recognize that the digital platform, while powerful, can be volatile and often does not promote the resolution of sensitive situations. Let us be mindful of our words and actions, fostering a culture of understanding, empathy, and online and offline accountability. Let us create a supportive environment where everyone feels safe and valued.”

The girl had every right to share the story the way she saw it. She recounted her experience, which was harrowing for her. No one can question that. No one can take that away from her. She found an outlet in social media as a safe space for victims of this kind of violation. While many have called it mere clout-chasing, especially after the facts were settled, the post is instructive, offering tips to readers on what they can do if they find themselves in a similar situation—record the incident, confront the offender, demand to end the ride right away. 

Unfortunately, the post was also destructive, instantly engendering vilification for the driver who is identified (a screenshot of the booking with his name and profile picture was attached to the post). 

It’s one thing to feel certain about being violated. It’s another to accuse in the court of public opinion. It’s trial by publicity with a clear intent to court non-judicial judgment—sympathy for yourself and condemnation for the other party. 

It was brave of the driver to come out. Public perception about cases of sexual perversion and abuse tends to favor the aggrieved, especially women.

Apparently, the student was banking on this, and for the most part, she got it. But inadvertently she also opened herself up to public shaming. Some haha’d her story, finding it incredulous that someone would pleasure himself at the sight of a plus-size woman like her. Some have called her “delulu” for thinking anyone would find her sexually attractive; they used to be called Neanderthals. Her allegations were eventually proven to be a figment of her imagination doesn’t change that. 

The driver has not only been proven innocent, he has also proved to be a totally decent human. “Bahagi ng aking pakiusap habang umuusad ang imbestigasyon ay huwag po sana nating atakihin ang nag-post laban sa akin,” he said in a follow-up post to his rebuttal of the charges against him, which came out before the conclusion of the Grab investigation and release of its findings.

“Bilang tatay ay naiinitindihan ko rin ang maaring maramdaman ng kaniyang mga magulang sa naging reaksyon ng mga tao sa social media sa kanilang anak,” he added.

The facts of the case may have been determined but the story feels incomplete. The girl needs to make an apology as public as her post that started the entire brouhaha. And not just to the driver but to potential real victims of sexual abuse in the future who might be scared to come out in the open for fear of the kind of backlash she has gotten from the public. That’s the least she could do.

Disclaimer: The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not reflect the opinions of PhilSTAR L!fe, its parent company and affiliates, or its staff.