We all have that one friend that’s quite hard to please or difficult to pigeonhole. An exotic plant, a bottle of wine, coffee beans, a new bestselling book — these go-to gifts just won’t cut it. He/she may just heave a courtesy thanks before placing your purchase to the dustbin of history.
So for that friend who is a little off center, a bit crazy, with a splash of naughty, here are some nutty gift suggestions that might just tickle his/her fancy.
Carbs and all that it has stood for have been unfairly demonized recently as a wave of fitness diets and trends spurred many not to touch with a ten-foot pole these glorious reanimations of starch. But your oddball contrarian friend would surely welcome this gigantic pillow with open arms. For P488 on Lazada, you could gift your friend the opportunity to befriend and cuddle a much marginalized and maligned food group of our troubled society.
Dadbod fanny pack
This challenging year has forced all of us to stare down at our demons in the face, even wear it on sleeves, or maybe around our waist. The bulging paunch is a badge of honor that all upstanding husbands worth their salt, and bag of groceries, now wear with their pride and honor intact. You can get this glorious man dad waist bag at Shopee for around P250 for that friend who has it in himself to wear his glittering coat of arms loud and proud for all the world to see.
Beach plans have been cancelled this year thanks to the pandemic. But hey, at least you could buy this downright strange fish slipper, right? No? Ok. Fair enough. In any case, you could scoop up this plastic flip-flops for P440 over at Shopee. If in case you are strange enough to give this to a friend, don't miss the once in a lifetime opportunity to scar your friend for life by saying these magic words as you proffer your package -- "fish be with you."
With the vaccine on its way, we are slowly inching our way toward an eventual normalization and faster than we know it, we will have our hands full doing all sorts of stuff we don't like to do but should actually do in order to live, which is called work in other words. Give your friend the opportunity and freedom to make himself or herself useful for the greater good without worrying whether to use his left or right hand to hold an umbrella when it's raining or sunny. The best part? Your crazy friend will look like a walking lamp. But a useful lamp nonetheless, right? That's what counts. People will see the... light in that situation. This goes for P50-P100 over at Shopee and Lazada.
Coffee mug from Libreng Komiks
If you have a crazy friend whom you suspect is just one tantrum away from being a serial killer, chances are he guzzles black coffee first thing in the morning. That black and bitter miserable liquid is what keeps him sane and grounded, or at least that's what he or she says. Or maybe it's a metaphor for life? Anyway, you could try pandering to his idiosyncratic and lunatic tendencies by giving him this mug from Libreng Komiks which comes with a free book and stickers. Support your nutty friend and support a great local artist. Good deal, right?
Lechon plush toy
It ain't a holiday spread without the centerpiece lechon. But your friend is now watching his weight. And he has turned vegan. Ok. No meat? No problem. You could get then this lechon plush toy from Takaw Toys at Shopee for P3,500. A bit pricey? Just think it's still way cheaper than buying a whole lechon. And has less calories. Zero in fact. So, that's a win in our book.
Milk tea pillow
Your friend can't get enough of her milk tea? She's dreaming of swimming in a pool of winter melon tea as the moonlight glistens on the horizon? Yet, it beats her that she's packing on the pounds? Don't call Sherlock Homes just yet to solve this utterly compelling and perplexing real-life mystery. Elementary, my dear Watson. Just buy this Milk Tea pillow from Lazada for at least P500 and she may just have the best of both worlds, or not. Well at least she'll have a nice pillow.
Aniya is a local clothing brand that sells all sorts of hip and smart-alecky merchandise that draws from pop culture and the current zeitgeist lingo. Your friend is a tough nut to crack but is in fact a closet admirer of local celebrities? Give this "T*ngina Naman Bash!" tote bag for P150. Swipe through the gallery to see some of their shirts (P350) and purse (P50).
So you are at your wit's end with no hope in sight that could appease your lunatic friend. You are now faced with a go big or go home moment. Well then, snap up this crazy penis pillow for around P1,300 at Lazada for no reason, which is sold by a variety of sellers such as Kaiqi and Zhengshuang. Do not flinch as you make the purchase. Do not blink as you hand it over to your dear friend. This is your moment. Swing for the fences. Go for all the marbles. You got this.