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Celebrating Fathers: The good, the bad and the prolific

By Ricky Toledo and Chito Vijandre, The Philippine STAR Published Jun 17, 2023 5:00 am

We have always valued close family ties, so it comes as no surprise that we would adopt Father’s Day. It’s also another excuse for a fiesta—a time to get together and enjoy all of Papa’s favorite dishes at home, or eat out in a restaurant and get him a gift at the malls. It’s a chance to show him how much he is appreciated.

In 1980 it was held on the first Sunday of December based on a proclamation by President Ferdinand Marcos Sr., but in 1988 President Corazon Aquino changed it to the third Sunday in June, and later President Joseph Estrada moved it to the first Monday of December. It’s now back to the June date, just like in the US and many other countries.

Some have their own dates, like Catholic countries in Europe celebrating it since the Middle Ages on March 19, which is St. Joseph’s Day. The saint is referred to as the fatherly Nutritor Domini (“Nourisher of the Lord”) in Catholicism and the “putative father of Jesus” in southern European tradition.

In the US, Father’s Day was not immediately accepted and only became a national holiday in 1972 under President Nixon. Mother’s Day came first and men always regarded a similar tribute to be too effeminate. Things changed when Sonora Dodd was inspired by Mother’s Day and convinced the Spokane Ministerial Association to set aside the third Sunday service in June 1910 to celebrate fathers, delivering presents to handicapped fathers, as boys wore roses on their lapels and city ministers devoted their homilies to fatherhood. This feast was widely publicized, striking a chord all the way to Washington, positioning Sonora’s celebration on the path to recognition.

Philippine National Hero Jose Rizal

The idea of fatherhood had changed and Father’s Day was no longer viewed as the feminine model but more as a day to celebrate what Dad likes to do and focuses on the larger roles that fathers play with their children. It’s a day to honor all kinds of fathers, and as seen through history and even in our own circles, we know that there are all kinds—from the best to the worst and yes, the most prolific ones.

Francisco Mercado Rizal, father of Jose Rizal

Filipino fathers have raised national heroes and national artists, thanks to their guidance and giving them the best education. Jose Rizal honored his father, Francisco Mercado Rizal, by sculpting a bust of the man, who no doubt was instrumental in catapulting him to greatness. Before his martyrdom in 1896, the national hero told his brother, “Tell our father I remember my whole childhood, his affection and his love. Ask him to forgive me for the pain I have unwillingly caused him.”

Philippine National Artist for Literature Nick Joaquin

Nick Joaquin, National Artist for Literature, was encouraged by his father, Leocadio Joaquin, to read books from a young age and would always have a book in one hand while polishing the floor with a coconut husk or running an errand.

Philippine National Artist for Dance Alice Reyes and her father, Ricardo Reyes

National Artist for Dance Alice Reyes was the apple of her father, Ricardo Reyes’, eye. When her paternal grandmother remarked, “Oh, my, she’s as dark as a monkey” upon seeing her as a baby, Ricardo laughed off his mother’s remark and said, “Look how beautiful she is.” And Alice indeed turned into a swan inheriting his musical gifts and dancing talents, which she shared with the country and with a dance company that bears her name.

The Sy family with their late patriarch, Henry Sy, Sr. (seated) with children (from left) Harley, Hans, Teresita, Felicidad Tan (wife), Elizabeth, Henry Jr. and Herbert

Philippine business tycoons have also passed on their talents and advocacies to their children. Teresita Sy-Coson, vice chairperson of SM Investments and the eldest of six children of the late “Shopping Mall King” Henry Sy Sr., said of her father: “He was the most hardworking. Being a man of few words, we learned from him mostly through his example—to be thrifty and maintain a modest lifestyle, to maintain good people and business relationships, to always strive for excellence.”

Filipino fathers have raised national heroes and national artists, thanks to their guidance and giving them the best education. Jose Rizal honored his father, Francisco Mercado Rizal, by sculpting a bust of the man, who no doubt was instrumental in catapulting him to greatness. Before his martyrdom in 1896, the national hero told his brother, “Tell our father I remember my whole childhood, his affection and his love. Ask him to forgive me for the pain I have unwillingly caused him.”

Jaime Zobel de Ayala, the Ayala Group patriarch, is known for promoting Filipino arts and culture, which he and his children have spearheaded through “Bravo! Filipino.” He has imparted this celebration of Filipino talent as well as the importance of education with various programs, the latest being the ABT and Cecile Licad show, chaired by his daughter, Sofia Z. Elizalde, for the benefit of CENTEX, which provides quality, holistic education to underserved children.

J. Paul Getty and his grandson, John Paul Getty III

On the other end of the spectrum are fathers who are not the ideal to be emulated by their children. John Paul Getty, one of the richest men in the world, was obsessed with protecting his wealth. He installed a payphone in his mansion to avoid paying for his guest’s phone bills. When his son Timothy died of a brain tumor at age 12, he complained bitterly about the medical expenses and did not even attend the funeral. In 1973, his grandson John Paul Getty III was kidnapped but he refused to pay the ransom of $17 million. When the kidnappers cut off the boy’s ear, he grudgingly gave only $2.2 million because that was the maximum amount he could deduct on his taxes.

Philander Rodman with a poster of his son, former NBA player Dennis Rodman

Former NBA player Dennis Rodman did not have the best childhood since his father, Philander Rodman, abandoned him and his mother at age six, going to the Philippines, marrying two Filipinas and fathering 29 kids with 16 different women. Father and son nevertheless reunited in 2012 when Philander tried making money off his son and succeeded a few times.

Dolphy

Just as prolific as Philander are legendary Filipino fathers like the late basketball player Lou Salvador Sr., who supposedly fathered over 100 children with as many as 49 women. Among his children are actors Phillip Salvador and Alona Alegre. Dolphy, the King of Comedy, was also famous for his 18 children with six different women.

Joe with one of the 160 babies he sired

In the UK, a sperm donor with the pseudonym of “Joe” claims to have fathered more than 160 kids, having traveled all over the world, including the Philippines, to have sex with nearly 200 women who were struggling to conceive, aside from helping many get pregnant without ever meeting them. Despite having so many children, however, he says his Father’s Day will be quiet since he will only see one of them for his big day: “It’s so different from Mother’s Day, which is all about getting flowers and all these things, but Father’s Day, if you’re lucky, you might get some socks.”