Nugagawen?
If the title sounds oddly familiar, it’s probably because “nugagawen” echoes the Filipino phrase “Ano ang gagawin?” (“What to do?”) but with a twist—one that captures a modern mix of resignation and contemplation.
Recently hearing “nugagawen” from young people brought a smile to my face. It’s not groundbreaking or new, but it’s so fitting. The word captures that tired but knowing response to life’s curveballs—a gut punch of frustration, a sigh of inevitability, and yet, a silent readiness to figure things out.
Going to a destination wedding where you’re the bridesmaid, but your flight to the venue got canceled? Nugagawen. Told to cover an event in Tawi-Tawi when you already planned a trip to Taipei? Nugagawen. A pop quiz on the French Revolution the morning after Olivia Rodrigo’s concert? OMG. Nugagawen.
Much like the “laptop girl” meme—crying while typing away—saying “nugagawen” expresses that familiar, resigned exhaustion. You know you’re going to do it, but you’d rather not. The task is inevitable, the choice non-existent. But there’s still a hint of agency, however faint, in the decision to keep going.
It’s a mantra for the younger generation—and by younger, I mean those that came after Gen X—a tired but resilient response to the never-ending challenges of adulting. They don’t just throw up their hands and say “bahala na” as we and our elders did, leaving everything to fate and to God. “Nugagawen” is more like an acknowledgment that yes, life is tough, but we’ll still figure it out—eventually.
Life is supposed to be about balance—family, friends, work, and a little personal happiness sprinkled in. In reality, though, it’s a juggling act where you’re constantly one slip away from dropping everything. People expect you to be the perfect child, friend, employee, and, eventually, spouse. And somewhere in between, you’re supposed to sneak in some “me time.”
First off, let go of the idea that everything has to be perfectly planned. The future is unwritten, and while it’s great to have a roadmap, sometimes you have to just wing it. Move forward, slow down, take a detour—just don’t get stuck looking back. Life’s filled with clichés, and they exist for a reason: because they work.
Family, for instance, is both a refuge and a source of stress. They’re your anchor but also the ones who sometimes make you want to scream and bolt. Take the classic family gathering where titas ask when you’re getting married. You smile politely and say, “I’m still looking for the right one, Tita.” Nugagawen. But in that bubble in your head, your sassy alter ego is asking why they’re not preparing to meet their maker.
Every person is unique, shaped not just by their family but by education, experiences, and relationships. We go through life hitting all the traditional milestones—study, build a career, maybe start a family, and then hope that when we retire, we’ve set our kids up to do the same. But somewhere along the way, many of us decide that the “tried and tested” path isn’t for us. Millennials started this trend of redefining success, and Gen Z and Alphas are continuing to break the mold.
For this generation, ‘nugagawen’ isn’t a question. It’s a reflection of life today — full of choices that feel both overwhelming and inevitable.
When work isn’t paying enough or feels unfulfilling, but you stay in the rut anyway because you need the job. Nugagawen. Maybe it’s time to find something else, and you’re constantly checking your LinkedIn account for updates. After all, work is a double-edged sword—it fuels your dreams but drains your energy. And in a world obsessed with productivity, it’s easy to feel like you’re never doing enough. That’s where burnout creeps in. The key is to step back and reassess, instead of diving headfirst into the grind. Sometimes, it’s okay to choose what’s immediately doable and take it one step at a time.
When the guy you thought was “the one” turns out to be more interested in his mom’s approval than your relationship, but you stick with him like a desperate millennial being nagged by her parents for grandchildren. Nugagawen. It’s quite different if your guy seems to be happier spending time with your brother or his gym buddy, or if that hot influencer girlfriend is draining your wallet and your patience. Noticing red flags is also a survival skill honed over time and bad experiences. So, nip it in the bud, cry a little, and book a solo trip to Bangkok, or simply walk away and finally buy that big bike or that designer bag you’ve been eyeing.
New-age relationships come with their own set of challenges. People turn to dating apps and emojis, avoiding phone calls like the plague. At the end of the day, trust, respect and communication still matter most. If things don’t work out, just remember, there are eight billion people in the world. Chances are, you’ll find “the one” out there, which you can’t do if you’re cooped up in your room all day, 24/7.
As we navigate adulting, we start to realize we can’t win all the time. And that’s okay. When your parents disapprove of your life choices, you just have to sigh, suck it up, and accept that you’ll never win that argument. Other times, you try to win them over, even if it feels futile.
For this generation, nugagawen isn’t a question. It’s a reflection of life today—full of choices that feel both overwhelming and inevitable. But somehow, we’ll always figure it out, one tired sigh at a time.
