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Heart Evangelista on motherhood after losing twins: 'I didn't realize how much I wanted it so badly'

By Ratziel San Juan Published May 13, 2023 10:20 am

Heart Evangelista has opened up about previously experiencing motherhood only to lose her twins.

On the May 12 episode of Fast Talk with Boy Abunda, the titular host asked his guest about the pressure of having a child, how bad that experience was in her life, and how she was able to cope with it.

"Having a baby wasn't really a priority for me, because I've always been trained to be a go-getter, hard-working, no vacations. So nung time na 'yun, takot akong mabuntis, even if I was married," Heart recalled.

She explained how she was the youngest child in her family and her mom, Cecilia Ongpauco, was "hardcore" in terms of building her up.

"But when I got pregnant, I didn't realize how much I wanted it so badly," Heart reflected.

The I Left My Heart in Sorsogon star said the experience was life-changing as it changed her viewpoint on motherhood: "It changed me a lot, because I didn't think I would be a good mom. I didn't think that I wanted to be a mom."

"But that's something that I'm very thankful for. That even for a brief," she said holding back her tears. "Bakit ganon? Even for a brief moment in my life, I realized that I can be a better person. Not necessarily that you have to give birth, or not necessarily that you have to physically be a mom. But the idea and what my angels made me feel, good enough for me."

Boy then followed up if the actress still wanted to be a mom.

"I don't know. Honestly, I don't know. If I'll be a mom, why not? I remember at the time, pinagdasal ko na, 'Find your way back to me, in any form.' And for me, hindi ko pinipilit 'yung mga bagay bagay. I don't allow myself to be heartbroken dahil may bagay na hindi binigay sa'kin, because I'm always grateful," she concluded.

Heart and her husband, Senator Francis "Chiz" Escudero, announced in May 2018 that they were expecting twins. However, Heart subsequently suffered a miscarriage.

She previously opened up about her difficult experience with in-vitro fertilization.