Padilla asks how husbands can demand sex from wives 'legally'; lawyer reminds him about consent, mutual respect
Sen. Robin Padilla asked a lawyer and women and children's rights advocate how husbands can demand sex from their wives "legally," but ended up being reminded that rape exists even between married couples—and that there must be mutual respect.
During the Senate Committee on Public Information and Mass Media hearing, Padilla asked Atty. Lorna Kapunan what husbands can do, within the bounds of the law, to urge their wives to have sex with them.
Kapunan then noted that it may not be a legal issue but a psychosocial one, citing instances of the husband demanding sex when intoxicated or high on drugs.
"Kung minsan kasi, ang 'No' ng babae naman arbitrary," she said. "Syempre, under that circumstance, magiging violent. Hindi out of love."
Padilla then asked what if there's no alcohol or drugs and was just "out of urge."
"Nandiyan asawa mo to serve you, ayaw niya. Ano ang puwede kong (gawin) para 'di ako mareklamo ng asawa ko? Ano ang puwede kong sabihin sa kanya?” he said.
Kapunan answered that the couples need to undergo counseling. "O magdasal na lang kayo," she added, making Padilla and others laugh. "Manood kayo ng Netflix o Korean telenovela."
Kapunan stressed the importance of mutual respect in marriages. "If your spouse refuses, whether valid or hindi, respetuhin natin ang decision ng wife. O nung husband," she said.
She then pointed out that it is not the obligation of the wife to serve her husband. "Maraming lalaki dito ang nakikinig. We amended the family code to remove the obligation of obedience."
Kapunan said rape applies the moment the husband forces her wife to have sex with him.
"'Pag sinabing no, no means no. (It) applies to both genders. Hindi siya pwede i-force ng asawa,” Kapunan said, in response to Padilla asking whether husbands cannot take no for an answer.
The lawyer also reminded everyone not to trivialize rape.
According to the National Demographic and Health Survey in 2022, about 2.3% of women underwent sexual violence from their spouses and partners. The World Health Organization, meanwhile, said one in three women have been subjected to either physical and/or sexual intimate partner violence or non-partner sexual violence in their lifetime.
The committee hearing was supposed to tackle sexual harassment allegations in the local media industry lately, not issues concerning the sex lives of married couples.
GMA Network's two independent contractors, Richard Cruz and Jojo Nones, were accused of sexually abusing Sparkle artist Sandro Muhlach, the son of Niño Muhlach of the renowned showbiz family, in a hotel room. A program manager from TV5, meanwhile, was accused of sexually abusing an independent contractor who worked as a researcher for an investigative show.